Thursday, November 29, 2012


this is an essay especially for an awesome friend of mine. hope she likes it.

   Propping his shoulder against the wall as he glanced the room in brooding silence, I stared at his manly features. A note of uneasiness was depicted from his muscular face as he eagerly waited for me to get into labour. I, myself did not deny the fact that I was too worried with the prospect of having this baby. He looked at me with a nonchalant smile and came closer to my bed, grasping my hand to a gentle touch.

   Suddenly, an agonising pain surged across my body. Then, I realised that I having this painful contractions. Alarming my husband, I screamed as I held his hand ever so tightly, refusing to let him go. Seconds passed, the doctor came in and rushed me into the nearest labour room and as I entered into the dimly lit room with a frightening ambience, a very vivid flashback flickered before my eyes.

   It was my first meeting with my family doctor and I met her alone as my husband had to go abroad for his demanding job. During my first seven months of pregnancy, I frequently experienced pain on the left side of my stomach that I would sometimes faint because of it. So i told the doctor about the problem and she told me to go to the hospital and to have a thorough medical check-up.

   Since my husband was not around at that time, I went to the hospital alone with the help of my dearest best friend to aid me during my lonely moments. She sent me to the hospital and my hands started to tremble as I had always had bad experiences being in a hospital. Entering the room after undergoing a series of medical check-up, I looked at the doctor's face, searching for the answer to the difficulties that I had but there was no clear expression.

   Taking my seat as my feet tremores to the eerie sight being in front of the doctor, he began the conversation. He asked me so many things that there were at times, I felt he was trying to conceal the news from me that up to a point, I stopped answering and demanded the truth. His face completely changed and it was an omen, signifying that I was going to receive a bad news. He told me that.

   Suddenly, I woke up from my bed and looked around, a bit oblivious to my surroundings. With a blurry view, a man came to me and brought a baby in his hand, cuddling it with warmth and care. it was my child. He came closer to  me, putting the baby into my frail hands and I looked at the baby and tears rolled down my cheeks, as I remembered what the doctor had told me.

   Since that day, I would release a balloon outside my house into the air, attached to it a wish to god. After three months of taking care of the baby, everything seemed to be fine until that one night, I noticed my baby was not breathing normally, gasping for air. I woke up and dragged my husband along with me to the hospital, taking my baby. Minutes of waiting was worrying for me as my baby started to show the sign that I has always prayed for it not to happen.

   Calling my name along with my husband, I rushed into the room and saw my baby was put into an incubator. The doctor approached me, calming me and he told me that my baby was going to be fine. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later so I quickly wrote my new wish on a piece of note, and I kept it safely  in my purse.

   I knew that time, god had always been answering my prayers and I was not going to lose hope. As soon as I arrived home, I attached my wish to a balloon that I had bought earlier and went outside of my house. I released that one blue balloon and a gush of wind swept it away until it was stucked to a tree. Before I could do anything, my husband called and his face was not happy as it used to.

   Grabbing my hand with anger, we went to the hospital and he told me the news. Beyond my consciousness, I fell onto my knees and screamed as tears rolled down my cheeks. My baby was finally gone and I knew that time, my baby was fighting for his life to stay alive. I cupped my hands on to my face and leaned my head against my husband's shoulder, too saddened by the news.

   Since that day, I had always released 100 balloons into the air to decorate the sky with their vibrant colours as a remembrance of my first born baby. Attached to it was a note, the very last note that I had written which was blown by the wind during that hurtful incident. And on that note I wrote "Thank you god for you had always been there for me during my sad moments. And that you had given me the chance to spend even longer time taking care of my baby. Thanking you, for you had given me a perfect baby, a baby that was supposed to be born with no hands or even eyes to look at me. for you had not made what the doctor had said to be true. thank you."

corrections were made during the writing of this essay. hope you like it :))

No comments:

Post a Comment